a distant muse

self portrait by phy




"she puts up a poker face all the time to conceal the bashfulness, but the camera has betrayed her." -phy's personaly statement on flicker




recalling the first day of our encounter, both were being caged in an air conditioned box.
she appeared to me as a peacock. in black.
if a gesture is always a signiture of something or somebody. phy's must be colors. even in monotone. she shines.
a novice. she claims it to be the only way she prefers to be situated.
dances, photography, design, performance, writing, music.
the ongoing list of amateuristic passions.
a morning dew on an everyday apple.

walking towards the opposite tip of the same pole, yet sometimes our explosions clash.
tonight
her statement clicks my mind again.
me same as a poker on the surface.
my words and photography turns my sentimentality inside out.

dear folks,
dont ever tempt me to put up any truth to you.
reality is a rupture between seeing and believing.
respect is the way for you to see the truth. of me.

my distant muse, thank you.
today i finally find an excuse to explain my schizophrenia
(truly inspired by your personal statement).